Wednesday, March 10, 2004

blogger_idol-1.gif Week 8: "I Confess"

I'm so vain, I probably think this blog is about me.
I have come to the conclusion lately that I am incredibly vain. Or self-centered, if there's a difference. It seems that all I think about is me, me, me, and/or anything that could affect me, especially in an adverse way. I obsess over my weight: I'm far too overweight, and I'm always looking at myself in the mirror, disgusted with myself for being such a slob. Never mind that a good portion of the weight I've gained is due to the medication that I was on for the last two years--I still find me calling myself things like Jabba the Hut. Yet, despite this, I worry about losing the amount of weight that I need to lose, because--omigod, what if I end up looking like those people on Extreme Makeover who've lost massive amounts of weight and now have bloodhound bellies? What if I end up with my boobs around my knees? What if--God forbid--I end up looking my age?! See, this is what I'm talking about. Of course I want to lose weight--in fact, Rachel and I have made a commitment to start on the Body For Life program, starting this weekend. And the real reason I want to lose weight is for health reasons--no sense waiting 'til that first heart attack for start getting fit. ('Cause there might not be a chance to wait around for the second one.)

I'm also vain when it comes to my home surroundings. I haven't had company over for months, because my apartment never looks good enough for people to see it. Now, I could play this off as wanting to be a good hostess and have a nice environment for people to come into (and that does come into play), but let's face it--I mostly can't stand for anyone to think that this is how I really live. God forbid that anyone should think that my place isn't ready for a Martha Stewart Living photo shoot.

Anyway, I could go on and on (see? vain, I tell you!), but you get the picture. MY appearance, MY apartment, MY job, MY finances, MY WAY! One of my teachers in a Bible school that I attended defined "sin" as: my insistence upon my right to my own way. I see that. I'm working on it, little by little, sometimes by lowering my standards and expectations of myself, but mostly by trying to become more other-focussed, more aware of other people's issues that maybe I can minister to. I think that, as I do that, MY issues will loom less in the foreground and become less important. Let's hope so.

posted by #Debi at 10:17 PM | permalink | 0 comments


Post a Comment


Hi, I'm Debi. Once in a while I have a thought and I like to write it down before it goes away. This is where I write it.

100 things about me

Contact Debi

my design website

Subscribe to my RSS feed

Subscribe in NewsGator Online
Subscribe in Rojo
Add The Scriptorium to Newsburst from CNET
Add to Google

Put a Pin on the Map View my Guestmap
Free Guestmaps by

Debi Warford's Profile
Debi Warford's Facebook Profile
Create Your Badge

my photos
This is a Flickr badge showing public photos from debiwarford. Make your own badge here.

deep thoughts


bible gateway
bob & sheri
body for life
eastern kentucky university
fenian history
sean hannity
lexington celtic assn
g gordon liddy
sneaky peat
ulster project international
universalis (daily office)
vineyard central


a cup of Rich
alan creech
aled hughes
allison mabley
antony's attic
at home with keith
benediction blogs on
brian phillips
bryan sherwood
cliff between the lines
darren rowse
garden escapades
jason evans
jordon cooper
kevin rains
laura ogle
liz creech
matt mcdonald
mike todd
mr. farty
my neighbours are hoors
northwoods contemplative
nowheresville, usa
patrick puckett
peter matthews
peter white
pigeons escaped
rachel kochackis
real live preacher
where the hell was i?
the wrath of dawn

More weather by AccuWeather®

blog template designed by