Saturday, August 03, 2002

OK, I’m back. I had to take a little down time to get my thoughts back together and maybe calm down a bit. I’m taking Alan’s advice and trying to do this through a Word document so that if I do have a problem with Blogger, at least I won’t have to try to recreate all my thoughts again. We’ll see how this works…..

As I was saying, I’m avoiding posting on The Vine because I don’t like posting twice in a row there. It makes me feel as though I am dominating the “conversation”, and I do that enough in my face-to-face conversations. It’s a habit I’m trying to break. I am generally thought of as a good listener, and I’d like that reputation to have more of a basis in truth. It’s very easy for someone like me to listen with the purpose of formulating what I’m going to say in response; with that attitude, you aren’t really hearing the other person all the time. So, if any of you guys from VBCC are reading this, now would be a good time for you to feed my blog-reading habit by posting something. :-)

I am kind of bored thus far with my “word-a-day” e-mail that I subscribe to; so far, they have only sent me one word I wasn’t already familiar with, and that was a sports term, so I wasn’t exactly jumping for joy to have it added to my lexicon.(Side note: I heard someone on the radio the other day refer to their “lexicon of words”. Duh! What else would a lexicon be comprised of? I hate redundancies!)By the way, in case you were wondering, the sports term was "juke", meaning, "to fake someone out of position".

I’ve actually been listening to the radio a lot lately—I put on my headphones at work and listen while I type. One of my favorite shows is “The Bob and Sheri Show”, which comes on in the mornings here. The other day they interviewed an African-American jazz bagpipe player (!), Rufus Harley. He doesn’t seem to have a homepage, but when I looked him up on Google, there were 16,100 references! So, if you’re interested in finding out more about him, go for it! There’s plenty of info there. He played a little on the show, and he’s actually quite good.

I had my regular follow-up visit with my endocrinologist yesterday. That actually went quite well. She told me that I am doing better, even though I continue to gain weight, although at a slower pace than before. Once my lab work comes back, I hope to get the report that I can continue on my reduced dosage, and maybe after a while, I will actually begin to lose weight. I suppose a little more exercise on my part wouldn’t hurt, either. :-) I am starting to really like my doctor, Dr. Boggess, pretty well as a person; she actually gets my sense of humor. At first I may have put her off by telling her that I believe in God and divine healing and that I didn’t accept the diagnosis that I would be dealing with the Grave’s disease (see my July 8th post) for the rest of my life. Maybe she thought I was one of those “religious nut-cases”, or maybe I just thought she thought that. Anyway, lately our sessions have felt almost more like a couple of friendly acquaintances getting together than an office visit. I wonder if God has a purpose in this……

One last thing before I sign off; I was listening to the aforementioned Bob and Sheri Show the other day, and they had people call in with stories of difficult pregnancies. One woman called in with a story that sparked a little spiritual reflection in me. She told about when she was in labor in the hospital, she became frightened by the sounds of women screaming in the ward. (This was apparently about 25 years ago, before some of the better advances in OB-GYN.) She got out of bed, dressed, and ducked out of the hospital with the intention of driving herself home. She said she told herself, “I can’t have this baby—it’s not so bad being like this! I’ll just be pregnant forever!” (Apparently labor can cause a loss of sanity.) Anyway, that phrase, “I’ll just stay pregnant forever!” stuck in my head. We use a lot of pregnancy metaphors in “Christianese”, such as “birthing a ministry” and so on. Alan has been talking to me lately about it being time for me to think about starting a home fellowship here. Even though I know (way deep down inside) that he’s probably right, my gut reaction when he says this is always sheer terror. I keep thinking I just want to stay ‘pregnant’ forever! Of course, I know that that is not healthy, and that I need to just get up, clean this place up, and figure out who the heck would want to come hang out here with me. Pray with me that God will show me who is supposed to be part of a home fellowship at my place.

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Hi, I'm Debi. Once in a while I have a thought and I like to write it down before it goes away. This is where I write it.


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